Acceptance Doesn't Equal Defeat
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Have you ever found yourself blindsided by life? Don’t you hate it when these situations cause such an emotional, physical, spiritual, or financial upset that it feels as though you will never get back on track? Generally, when we are blindsided, it’s not in a good way. Financial stress, sudden loss, break ups, employment changes can all be things that trip us up or turn our world upside down. We feel so overwhelmed with emotions we can’t think clearly and then begin to fixate on the perceived meaning of these changes. For example, your employment status changes – are you telling yourself if you hadn’t screwed up, you would still have the position you were in? Break ups – I’m sure I did something to cause this. Sudden loss – I’m a horrible person for not reaching out sooner…You get the picture. These stories only perpetuate the cycle of upset. And I assure you, it will keep you stuck. Stomping your feet and bitching about how life is unfair isn’t going to make you feel any better.
The one saving grace we have when life tries to knock us down is acceptance. Being able to radically accept our current situation helps us release all the stories we are telling ourselves related to the situation. Drop the story and drop the label. It’s not good or bad and it doesn’t say anything about you. The situation is simply a situation. Acceptance will help extract you from the loop you have been stuck in, so you can more clearly see your options and begin to make useful meaning of the situation.
How to practice radical acceptance
Instead of focusing on how unfair or painful a situation is, shift your thoughts to those of acceptance. Practice telling yourself, “Things are as they are. Everything is temporary and this will pass”. You don’t have to admit defeat nor should you. Notice how physically expansive it feels to surrender and accept the current situation as it is with a clear understanding that things will get better. Take a deep breath. As you exhale, relax your body. Say to yourself “I accept things as they are. It’s okay. I’m okay. I can do this.” Say it over and over as much as you need to. This is how you accept and release. Let me know how this goes for you by leaving a comment below!